6 Steps to Develop Empathy in Sales and Win Customers
Empathy is One of the Noblest Human Emotions
Practicing empathy toward others not only helps us become better people, but it can also contribute to building connections with those we interact with at work—including customers.
Being empathetic in sales creates value for potential customers and can bring significant benefits to businesses.
Through empathy, we can put ourselves in someone else’s shoes to understand a different perspective, fostering trust and credibility.
An empathetic salesperson goes beyond just listening and interpreting what the customer is saying. They strive to deeply understand the customer’s processes, routines, challenges, and aspirations.
A good salesperson uses empathy to imagine themselves in the customer’s situation, centering the sales process around the customer’s needs rather than just talking about the product or service.
Companies that encourage employees to demonstrate empathy have a competitive advantage over their competitors because their sales teams genuinely and sincerely seek to help customers.
This transforms the customer’s buying journey and contributes to long-term loyalty.
What Is Empathy?
Structurally speaking, empathy is the ability to put yourself in someone else’s place and feel what they are feeling in a given situation.
It means being open to understanding emotions and feelings in a rational and objective way.
Empathy is built on four pillars:
- Perspective-taking (considering another person’s viewpoint as valid);
- Non-judgment (avoiding giving positive or negative opinions about the situation);
- Recognizing others’ emotions (not minimizing what someone else feels);
- Clear communication (expressing thoughts in a clear and objective manner).
This concept is widely applied by human resources specialists as well as sales professionals.
By adopting an empathetic approach at work, it becomes easier to identify customer pain points, deeply understand how these challenges impact their routine, and naturally connect them with the products or services that can help solve their specific problems.
Providing Empathy Is Providing Great Customer Service
This skill is highly valued in the corporate world and is increasingly required in future leadership roles, as it allows for a more comprehensive and nuanced perspective on various issues.
During negotiations, empathy can be a powerful tool.
When an ideal customer feels comfortable being heard, they are more likely to trust that their needs will be met through your product or service.
Through a harmonious relationship between the salesperson and the prospect, the customer gains clarity that both sides are working together to find the best solution.
It’s important to note that having empathy for a customer doesn’t mean agreeing with everything they say or trying to please them all the time.
It’s essential to remain firm and assertive in your communication while actively listening and genuinely trying to understand the customer’s business.
You don’t need to share the same opinion to understand someone else’s reality.
Are Empathy and Sympathy the Same?
Being sympathetic is not the same as being empathetic.
Sympathy is linked to affinity, while empathy is about connection.
Being sympathetic means being friendly, pleasant, kind, polite, and even affectionate toward others.
On the other hand, being empathetic requires vulnerability—truly putting yourself in someone else’s place.
Although these concepts may seem similar, they have fundamentally different meanings.
A salesperson who is merely sympathetic will struggle to deliver the best solution—because their approach will focus on the attributes of the product or service rather than addressing the real needs of the customer.
You don’t need empathy to be sympathetic.
But a salesperson who has empathy will naturally bring sympathy along with them.
What Are the Three Levels of Empathy?
Empathy is considered one of the key components of emotional intelligence.
In Brazil, there is still plenty of room for growth in this area.
According to a study on the world’s most empathetic countries, Brazil ranked 51st out of 63 nations analyzed by the University of Michigan, USA.
Psychologists and neuroscientists Daniel Goleman and Paul Ekman describe empathy in three fundamental types:
Cognitive Empathy – Understanding Another’s Perspective
The most well-known form of empathy is about stepping into someone else’s shoes.
Earlier in this article, we touched on this type of empathy, which involves understanding another person’s feelings.
In a business context, cognitive empathy can be applied by observing what’s happening within a customer’s company and genuinely caring about it.
This type of empathy is highly effective in communication.
Great communicators have a heightened awareness of others, which helps them deliver messages more effectively.
By understanding the customer’s world, you can communicate your solutions in a more persuasive way.
Emotional Empathy – Sharing Another’s Feelings
Psychologist Paul Ekman describes this type of empathy as a form of emotional contagion.
This occurs when emotions are shared, creating a deeper emotional connection.
Affective empathy is also at play when you pay close attention to the emotions of others.
In practice, emotional empathy can be used when, for example, you notice that a customer is feeling stressed, exhausted, or worried about something—which affects their focus and engagement.
A customer’s emotional state can impact how you approach them, which is why recognizing subtle cues is so important.
You can observe body language, tone of voice, and behavior to determine the best way to proceed with the conversation.
Respecting a customer’s emotional state might not result in an immediate sale, but it will leave the door open for future business opportunities.
This allows you to personalize your approach, distinguishing between lukewarm and hot leads.
Compassionate Empathy – Recognizing a Need and Taking Action
Compassionate empathy leads to action.
By understanding someone else’s situation and forming an emotional connection, an empathetic person is naturally motivated to offer support and assistance.
This is also known as empathetic concern.
To see this in practice, imagine a customer shares a concern about an internal issue within their company but isn’t sure how to resolve it.
Even if this problem isn’t directly related to the product or service you offer, actively listening and showing support can make a significant impact.
If you have a suggestion, you can offer advice.
Providing a “listening ear” fosters trust—and when a customer trusts you, they are more likely to buy from you.
What Is an Empathetic Salesperson?
An empathetic salesperson seeks to understand the customer’s pain points rather than simply presenting the same solutions over and over again.
They have a keen perception of the situation and know when to approach a sale without being overly persistent or aggressive.
Unlike an unprepared salesperson who dominates the conversation as an authority figure, an empathetic salesperson actively listens more than they speak.
They are also skilled at asking open-ended, exploratory questions—leading to deeper conversations and insights.
Why Apply Empathy in Sales?
Empathy is the foundation of high-value, personalized service.
Rigid, one-size-fits-all solutions no longer work in today’s market.
It is essential to adapt your offerings to meet each customer’s unique needs.
And how do you do that?
Through empathy.
Offering a flexible, individualized buying experience—far from traditional, rigid sales models—can be transformative for sales success.
Empathy plays a crucial role in attracting new customers and, ultimately, turning them into loyal clients.
Imagine a scenario where, through prior research, you identify a challenge or difficulty your ideal customer is facing…
(And that’s where your empathetic approach makes all the difference!)
During the meeting, you can demonstrate that you understand the market they are in by sharing your observations on this matter.
Right after that, you can present your product or service as a solution that will help them deal better with this pain.
In this way, without elaborate strategies, you can show your ideal customer that you’re not just a salesperson, but a trusted partner who contributes to business growth.
In summary, empathy is a great asset in the sales process.
Empathy as a Tool to Overcome Objections
Empathy is also useful for handling sales objections.
In addition to having a defined sales script in your mind that maps out all possible objections and reveals the best way to overcome them, you can also use empathy as a tool to dissolve objections.
By putting empathy into action, you’ll be able to put yourself in your customer’s shoes and identify their reasons for rejecting your proposal.
This way, you’ll gain clarity about what lies behind the objections.
Perhaps it’s the financial moment the company is experiencing, or maybe they are prioritizing other matters, or maybe it simply wasn’t the right time for the sales approach.
Even if your customer has “stuck” in the sales funnel, they can still be encouraged to finally convert.
In this case, the salesperson can work to nurture a quality relationship, so that in the future, this potential customer considers your solution.
6 Steps to Develop Empathy in Sales
1.Know when to Stay Silent
Calm your mind, control your speech, and give yourself the opportunity to listen.
Allow space for others to share their opinions and let others speak first when possible.
This way, you’ll absorb more information.
If you’re willing to listen, people will feel more comfortable sharing.
This is something sales professionals do consistently because they know it works.
2.Pay Attention
Listening means paying attention, not just hearing.
We don’t just listen with our ears but with our eyes and body.
Lean in, avoid staying still, and use gestures and facial expressions to show you’re paying attention to what’s being said.
“Paying attention” means investing a little of your time and energy to understand the other person.
3. Ask Clarifying Questions
Sales meetings can feel like an interrogation if you ask a thousand questions, quickly jot down the answers, and move on.
Instead, try to ask questions based on what your customer says and encourage them to provide more details.
For example, “You mentioned a difficulty you’re facing with your team lately. Have you done anything to change that?” or “You talked about a future launch. Can you share your expectations about that?”
By asking reflective questions, you can learn more deeply about your potential customer and show them that you’re listening!
4. Repeat What you Heard
When we use the exact words and phrases our customers use, we show that we respect their opinions and points of view.
Start incorporating what they say into your speech.
It’s really effective when you use the same terms they used to ask clarifying questions.
5. Summarize what was Said in your Own Words
Try to summarize the conversation the way you see the situation to show prospects that they are being heard and seen fully.
Do three things: use your words to describe the scenario, then name the main pillars of the conversation, and close with the concerns that reflect the customer’s needs.
6. Take action based on what you learned
What good is paying attention to everything if you don’t do anything with the information you received?
When you act according to what’s been shared with you, people feel cared for.
This attitude also helps you stand out among other salespeople and is a way to differentiate yourself and your company.
If you notice something abstract—like a sense that your customer is reluctant to move forward—show them the issue, let them know you’re available to discuss it, and ask what they need at that moment.
Avoid these common mistakes!
Pay attention to a few points to avoid making mistakes during your sales meetings.
Here are the main mistakes people make so you don’t have to go through them!
The need to know all the answers
This can lead to speaking too much and unnecessarily anticipating information.
Focusing only on What you Need to Say
This may block your ability to genuinely pay attention to your potential customer.
Correcting the Customer (or Interrupting them to do so)
Being right and being successful are not the same thing.
Agreeing with Everything your Prospect Says
Know when to share a different point of view and make sure to present evidence to justify your beliefs.
Rushing to Resolve Problems
First, try to understand how you can help before offering help.
Why?
Because, as Roosevelt said: “People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.”
How to Develop Empathy in the Team
While sympathy is easily applied in the relationship between seller and buyer, empathy needs to be genuinely developed.
It’s not possible to pretend to be empathetic because it’s impossible to put yourself in someone else’s shoes without truly connecting with them.
Therefore, if you want your team to be genuinely empathetic with your customers, you need to encourage them to develop and practice empathy.
Not everyone has the natural sensitivity to be empathetic, but with practice, this skill can indeed be developed.
Here are some tips for you to apply with your team to speed up the learning of employees about empathy:
Learn to Listen and read the Customer
This is the basic premise of empathy: being open to listening to what the other person has to say.
It’s also important to pay attention to non-verbal communication, such as gestures and facial and body expressions—these are key to understanding emotions.
Learn to Express Yourself
It’s not enough just to pay attention to what the customer says, it’s also important to communicate what you think and feel.
Communication is a great ally to empathy.
Communicating your ideas and perspectives is an effective way to build connection and identification with customers.
Put Yourself in the Other Person’s Shoes
We’ve already discussed the importance of this point in the article.
It’s worth reinforcing with your team the need to imagine themselves in the same situation as your customer.
Feeling what the prospect feels makes it easier to understand the best way to help them.
Develop Self-Awareness
Before understanding the other person, you need to understand yourself.
To connect with the customer, you must first connect with some feeling inside yourself that helps you understand how the other person feels.
Therefore, it’s essential to recognize your own feelings, emotions, and thoughts.
Once you’re connected with your feelings, it will be much easier to understand the other person’s.
Examples of Empathy in Sales
There are different ways to communicate empathy.
Here are a few examples of phrases that can be used in the sales context and that favor empathy.
“Does this make/did this make sense to you?”
This phrase serves as confirmation.
It can be used to make sure that the customer is genuinely interested in what you have to offer or to legitimize the progress of the sales process.
Through this phrase, you show that you’ll only share with the prospect what truly interests them, not wasting their time with something that doesn’t align with their expectations.
“I would also be concerned if I were in your shoes”
Through this statement, you can express empathy, showing that your customer’s pain is genuine, and you really understand what they are feeling while facing this problem.
We know that salespeople are already used to hearing the same objections over and over, and often, this ends up making it harder to take an empathetic approach.
Therefore, it’s important to demonstrate that you truly care about their issues, even if you’ve heard the same problem a thousand times.
“If I understood correctly, you’re saying that…”
This is a very effective way to show that you are listening attentively and with dedication.
Moreover, through this simple statement, you can confirm with your customer whether you understood everything they said correctly.
This will help align your speech with their expectations.
“Thank you for your time!”
Time is the most precious commodity – once it’s gone, it will never return.
Therefore, thanking the person for the time they’ve given for the sales meeting is a polite way to show respect.
Knowing how to recognize the value of the other person’s time is having empathy for others!
We hope this article has contributed to your career progress.
Empathy goes far beyond sales processes and the relationships between customer and salesperson.
If you manage to apply it in your everyday life, you’ll become a better person in all areas of life, not just work and sales.
Using empathy will greatly improve relationships in negotiations, and it’s up to you to take time to observe and be open to truly understanding the other person.
Remember that empathy is an inward-outward movement!
Let us know in the comments how you’ve been applying empathy in your sales processes or what aspects you feel you could still improve!
